“Don’t be fooled by the rocks that I got
I’m still, I’m still [Betty on a box]
Used to have a little, now I have a lot
No matter where I go, I know where I came from (from the Bronx!)”
Well, Sunshine via West Footscray, via a tree-free village in Sicily.
Those who know me, know that I’m a simple girl.
I don’t go for the big brands. I don’t wear Chanel cosmetics, I go for Napoleon.
And I’m vitually free ofgourmet bling – there’s some Kenneth Cole bling*, Victoria Mason bling* and that (now broken) necklace I got from the world’s biggest jewellery store when JJ and I got lost near Chiang Mai that time – bling* yes, but alas, no-name bling*.
Geez, I do like a pretty piece of jewellery though.
AND it’s a bouquet of flowers with a teeny lady bug and butterfly (Dior Milly la Floret amethyst ring)
And bunnies (Dior bunny ring)
And Memento Mori (Dior Memento Mori ring)
At around £8000 apiece, they are unlikely additions to the jewellery tree so… here’s something a little loser to home, and priced lower than the kitchen renovation, with thanks to the delightfully gorgeous taxidermist/jeweller, Julia DeVille (yep, that’s a real animal bone).
Last year I joined the Glamourpuss Studios tap dancing academy. For shits and giggles.
This year, I decided that travelling ACROSS THE RIVER just wasn’t on. Now, normally, it’s the folk from the other side of town who don’t like to cross the river but I’m well-and-truly guilty of reverse classism.
But the thing is, I found a tap dance school right up the road. I mean, how could I pass THAT up?
Well let me tell you how. There was a girl in my first (and only) class who was making some cute moves and the teacher said – I shit you not – “Who do you think you are? A showgirl?” Like it was a bad thing?
I mean… YES!
So that, along with this (below) is why I’m heading back to the other side. Technically I travel AROUND the river to St Kilda, not across it.
Hold the presses! I know, right? I’m the only one.
I can’t believe that I’ve become an avid internet shopper. I mean, what about the sensual experience that you can only get from walking into a shop, trying something on, squishing the new wool, smelling the pure leather, sliding your fingers across the surface of a porcelain plate or noticing the resin drips on the surface of a painting.
Well there’s still a place for that but the veritable enormity of products online means that the world is not just your oyster, it’s your clam, your very own pharmacy and art gallery all at your fingertips.
Sometimes both at once. Take this example. I’ve been looking for an interesting spice rack to go in my new kitchen and discovered this:
But they don’t ship to Australia! So I decided to get creative. Who knew you can buy real test tubes on the interwebs? WHO KNEW?
I mean, I know you can get anything, but test tubes?
And then I discovered all this other stuff I seriously didn’t know I needed.
So for weeks now, JJ has been teasing me about how he’s got me the best birthday present ever and how he’s completely outdone himself. Now, I happen to find that hard to believe because, well, here’s a very short list of the birthday presents I’ve received from him over the years:
Shopping trip to Penang. I know. It’s pretty freaking extravagant , but seriously, it’s just that we have no kids. And anyway, I saved us SO much money buying fashion in Asia.
Red and black cord coat from Dizingof
A necklace from William Griffiths not too dissimilar to this one (except mine has a heart instead of a gun!)
So he’s pretty good, right?
Well, I have to say that all that stuff is pretty ordinary compared to this year’s pressie on a number of fronts. I mean, he ACTUALLY managed to keep it a secret, and even managed to get Momo and Tim to keep it secret.
When Momo was in town recently after her superstar jaunt to the Australian Fashion Festival, I yelled at her thus:
“Tell me what he freaking got me for my birthday.”
To which she replied:
“No”
I don’t care for surprises, just like I don’t like to know what I’m having for dinner. There have been many disapproving conversations with JJ that have gone something like this:
JJ: What do you want for dinner?
Me: Oh I dunno, can’t you just decide?
JJ: How about macadamia chicken?
Me: Really? Can it get any more caloric?
JJ: Asian noodle soup with silverbeet?
Me: Silverbeet, hey? Hmm, sounds boring.
JJ: [Big annoyed sigh] Steak and salad.
Me: Hmmm…
JJ: Forget it. I’m just going to make something and you’ll love it.
It’s true. I mostly do love it.
I prefer a surprise when I don’t know I’m getting one. By all means, surprise me, just don’t let me know about it because it’ll drive me crazy!
But it was all worth it this year because BEHOLD!
JJ COMISSIONED A PIECE OF ART BY ONE OF MY FAVOURITE ARTISTS, CHRISTINA GORDON. You may have noticed a link to her artwork on this site. She’s glorious and talented and I love her and I love this! Its called “Yoyo and Peaches perform“. How clever of her to know that Peaches would be the one jumping through the hoop while Yoyo cowers… THANK YOU JJ AND THANK YOU CHRISTINA.
Oh yeah, my birthday’s in a few weeks… He couldn’t keep it a secret that long.
It’s true, it does take me a while to cotton on to things. So, I only just joined Facebook (and subsequently left it) a few months ago. I may recently have said something like:
Me: Hey, are you on Facebook? It’s really cool, huh?
The rest of the world: Um, yeah, right.
So anyway, here’s my new toy. Isn’t she beautiful! Her name is Helga, the Holga.
I’ve already crossed to the wrong side of the railway tracks and photographed the silos, as well as Momo’s beautiful kidneys – not on the wrong side of the tracks.
Yeeha! I am going to take some spectacular shots of neighbourhood.
Well I’ve set myself quite a task. Remember how JJ and I tried to crack an egg or two (make lebabies) and how it didn’t work, well since then I’ve embarked on a hella adventure to find THE THING that I’m here to do instead. And despite discovering the Meaning of Life, which helped me to see that maybe none of that shislik is important, I get this godawful, uneasy feeling that I’m supposed to be doing something. Last week, JJ and I thought that it was possibly because I’m going through the change – albeit VERY EARLY (and it would explain everything), but aside from this symptom, I haven’t feel the need to buy a sports car or get a divorce. So anyway, I’m NOT going through the change although I did allow myself a few blissful weeks feeling as though I was.
So I’ve been looking, looking, looking. I even studied and became a life coach (as seen on the Gilmore Girls – not me, Paris’s Life Coach after the meltdown). But helping others to find their bliss still left me feeling short changed. What about me? It’s like a Pyramid Scheme – you help others to help other to help others but nobody actually finds their bliss….
Whatever, so I discovered that I’m a writer and that’s the reason I’m here. OH RIGHT, that old chestnut. Because I sorta realised that when I was a young teenaged lass and wrote a novel. Oh, and that other novel I wrote and have been rewriting. Oh and the short stories and such. So there I’ve been, scampering around looking for something OTHER THAN the thing that’s under my nose.
Good, huh.
And then I was reading this book, Living Oprah (which is actually not so great because it really could have been so much more, so I won’t link to it). But it did get me thinking of doing something similar – a la Julie and Julia or Supersize Me. You know, where you take a concept and live by it for a period of time.
But what?
Because I like to follow arrows as I have mentioned before, it had to be something that has a step by step plan, something that I can follow absolutely. So JJ and I brainstormed (may have been altered for dramatic emphasis):
Me: JJ, I still haven’t worked out my Life Purpose. Do you have any suggestions?
JJ: How about following Anthony Robbins? He has a purpose.
Me: Well sure, but I don’t want a jet plane.
JJ: How about a million bucks then?
Me: I’d go for that. But I can’t be bothered following Robbins. He kinda freaks me out. I don’t think he sleeps.
JJ: Martha Stewart?
Me: Well you know how I love Martha, and she’s the source of much revelry. But she doesn’t sleep either.
JJ: That’s how she comes up with all that creativity.
Me: Hm. Yes. That and prison.
JJ: Well how about writing a novel?
Me: Oh, that old chestnut.
Pause for 2 days.
Me [today via Skype]: JJ I’ve got it. I’m going to kill two birds with one stone – I’m going to do The Artist’s Way and blog it. How do you like them apples?
JJ: Delicious! I’ll do it with you!
So that’s it. New project to come. Now if only I could find my freaking copy of the book.
